Saturday, September 19, 2015

The Day at the Rink

Since my two butt falls in a month, I've started wearing a coccyx pad to keep from injuring myself (yet again). Technically, this is an extra knee pad I stuff down the back of my tights. It's about 8 inches by 6 and a third of an inch thick.

So I go into the ladies to slip the pad in place. When I come out I go up to my coach and turn away from her. "Does this pad make me look like I'm wearing a diaper?"

My coach says 'No.", then the ice dance team next to her asks what's going on.

I relate the story of my two coccyx falls and how I'm' now wearing a 'butt pad'.

The woman ice dancer looks at my behind critically. "No, it doesn't look bad. You're just built like KK."

I give her a puzzled look. "Who is that?"

Everyone, my coach, the ice dancer and her male partner all laugh. "Kim Kardashian." the skater says.

"I don't think that's all due to the pad," I say.

The male ice dancer tries to pay me a compliment. "You know big butts are popular now."

Apparently coccoyx protection does make your butt look big.  Well, Baby Got Back!


One of my coach's little skaters likes to come up to me while I'm skating. She doesn't say anything, she just stares at me and smiles.

I'm fascinating.

So I usually ask her about her skating and get a one word answer. Today I asked her if she's working on her jumps. Head nod in return. "Which one?" I ask.

"I don't remember," she says.

"Is it your axel?"

She giggles and shakes her head in shock that I'd even mention the holy grail of skating. She may be only 6, but she knows it's 'the hard one'.

"Is it your flip?"

Head shake.

Man, I'm struggling here. Waltz jump? No. Mazurka? No. What's left? I take a stab at it. "Salcow?"

"YES!" and she skates away, adult confusion mission accomplished.


As I'm stepping off the ice, the elderly lap skater high fives me as he gets on the ice.

Finally! I'm noticed by someone nearly my age!

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