The group coach is new, and has never met me before. "Show me your spin," she says.
I do a 2 foot rocker into back cross into a counter clockwise spin. Pick up the free foot and do two rotation 1 foot spin.
"Hmmm," the coach says, "Do only one rotation two footed, you're lifting your foot on the second rotation."
There's a funny thing about rockers, I can never remember which direction ends up being the one to start on to get a particular spin direction. I pick one, and realize it's my alternate direction spin. But, I pick the foot up on the first rotation...so there!
The coach is puzzled. "Did you just do a spin in the..............opposite direction?" I'm almost certain, that in that long pause she had to keep herself from saying "wrong direction."
"Yes." I reply.
The coach gathered herself together and in the way people do when they want to discourage some behavior asked, "Why?"
"Because it's my ONLY trick!"
Mr Badass Skater does a Lutz. It's not his best. Since
our real coach is working with another student, I turn on my 'fake
coach' act. "Would Paul Wylie skate like that? No, Paul Wylie would go
out and perform that jump. Head up, smile, project!" I get
an eyeroll, but Mr Badass goes in for another Lutz. He wipes out sorta
like this. Lots of hopping around on one foot.
Well, that's the end of my 'coaching' career.
Next, Gold Skater nearly took out a adult beginner in the no man's land between our class zones when she did a (LOVELY!) Lutz. There was actual blade to leg contact. Mr. Badass and I had to suppress our laughter.
The Coach of the beginner class came over and said about her students, "They need to learn to look behind them when they skate backwards." No one cared about the beginner. I sorta feel bad about that. Sorta.
Did I tell you about False Spin Memory Syndrome where I think I"m doing one rotation two foot spin leading into a three rotation one foot spin, but I'm really doing three rotation two foot spin, leading into a single one foot spin? Apparently, I'm going to make that a thing now.