Winter's First Public Skate

Today should have had an empty rink for public. It was raining. It was Columbus day weekend and the sales were on. Everyone should have been at the mall or at home playing XBox. Instead they went to the rink.

I can't describe how crowded the rink was. There may have been a hundred people out there. Adults, kids, .....toddlers...., teens. Let's just assume there were a hundred people on the ice. Three hockey players, 8 figure skaters, and 89 ice tourists.

This is what the adult regulars looked like
when they saw the crush at the gate.

It was skateable. Okay, let me rephrase that. It was skateable if you were going forwards or had someone spotting for you backwards. It's not that the crowd was rough, it was just that there were so.many.people!  And so much RANDOMNESS in their skating!

At one point, one of the other adult skaters came up to me and said, "Be careful out here." I nodded, then as he and I parted ways, I dodged a random kid and skated right into him. Yeah, it was that kind of session, there were no escape routes.

As the session went on, all the figure skaters gradually slid into the center circle. Maybe it was the fact that there were so many of us in there, doing spins, small jumps, footwork, that the public stayed out. Not even the annoying aggressive sub-teen boys in hockey skates went in the center. First there was just a coach with a student, then other figure skaters passed through for a few seconds of skating--careful to stay clear of the lesson-- but as the crush of the ice tourists increased, the figure skaters stayed in the circle a bit longer each pass through. I worked on my two foot spin and edges. Skater Guy practiced his outside to inside  spread eagles. Teen girls did tiny jumps. The coach picked up her next student and the first one stayed to practice. The tension was building.

At the end of the first session, a solid wall of ice tourists swirled around the center. All the figure skaters were now confined inside the square, each concentrating on staying out of the others' way. Now there were 12 skaters in the center area guarding the center circle from the storm of rental skates. It felt like this:

 Heavy public sessions are now in season. Don't let a five year old take you down!

Figure Skating Culture

Figure skating culture is very entre nous. While the literal translation is "between you and me", the broader meaning is "only understood by insiders".

Outsiders see figure skating as

OMG! OLEM- PIKS!

Insiders see figure skating as building skills and making the cut

Outsiders see skating as "entertainment"

Skaters see it as "a program"

Outsiders see skating "for little girls"

(Mike Kirby was one of the founders of ISI. 

A Manley woman podcast with his son David Kirby 

has some interesting US skating history)

Insiders see it "for everyone"

Ice tourists base their idea of skating on their experience of public skate:

Skaters see it as practice, practice, practice....and learn to live with pain.....

And finally, outsiders see skaters at "sparkly little princesses"

But we KNOW....WE.ARE.ATHLETES!

Vanessa James

Frames Of Death!

 Technically they're called 'skating aids', those usually metal frames that are rented to families with little kids to push around on public ice.

I hates 'em.

First off, they hold up the kid and the kid having no sense goes as fast as he can. Can he stop? No. Does he care that he's in center ice? No. Do kids leave the frames on the ice next to the gate? Yes. Do teenagers get hold of them and fight 'ice wars' with them? Yes.

My worst experience. A kid picked one up at threw it at my head. It wasn't personal. He wanted to throw something, I happened to be in the way. I gave him the rough edge of my tongue.

Still, using a skating aid has a long, long history. The earliest pictures I've seen use a chair. This makes sense. Cheap stable, and on outdoor ice it gives you something to sit on after you get off the ice.

The original skating aid

Interestingly, in China there's a long history of outdoor chair skating. It's evolved into some elaborate equipment. I think you push yourself along with the sticks.

But people came up with other designs.

Yes, this is weird.

But there's many, many patented designs for frames around the world.

The Break Your Heart Version

The one with the modesty panel
(Actually, this seemed the safest)

This one screams "Nose Breaker"

The one that will roll over

These are adjustable and I've seen a lot of broken ones

There's also a polar bear version

 But there are skating frames that defy rationality.

The double banana version
I think the parent pushes
and the kids ride.
Maybe.

The buy your own, portable frame
Why, God, Why

Good idea having a metal bar at groin level.
This.is.insane.
It's from a rink in the U.S.

But just when you think it couldn't get any worse, someone comes up with the ultimate skating frame. A two seater.

Undergoing off ice trials now!

So, take heart, whatever frames are on ice at your rink, it could be worse!

What Do Ice Tourists See?

Since there was no freestyle this weekend, and Miss Cheerleader let me know that Publics were still super crowded, I wasn't able to skate this weekend.

All the local rinks are like this right now
Why can't they put one in MY town.....

So I got to thinking about what it was like the first time I was an Ice Tourist. Since I started skating my idea about what is going on on the ice has completely changed. Today I want you to reach back into your memory about what it was like, 'the first time'.

First off, what's with all the screaming? 

Then, almost every one clings to the boards (I at least could do slaloms) and inches their way around the rink. But there are a few who have taken lessons, and these brave souls get away from the boards and stroke for all they're worth...

Yep, this is me

What the Ice Tourist sees.....

"OMG! Look at her!"

(I once zipped past an Ice Tourist and she called out "How do you DO that!" It was a very gratifying moment.)

And then there are the hockey boys who set out to scare people. They look something like this, short little 11 year olds, traveling in packs, usually of three.

What the Ice Tourist sees....

"Run, Run, Run from Ghidorah before it destroys us all!"

And what about the little girls in the center ice, doing their jumps that you can barely pass a credit card between the ice and the blade. 

What the girls are doing....

Look at me jump!

What the Ice Tourists sees....

"Look at her jump!"

Anyway, I can't wait until summer when public ice is like this....

Dealing with Ice Tourists

Public skate is for 'the public'.  Most of 'the public' are Ice Tourists  who don't skate regularly and only visit the rink on public sessions. I'm happy they're there. They help keep the rink open.

I don't expect them to know about the coned off center. Really, rinks should post signs, "The coned off center ice is for lessons, jumps and spins." for it to have any meaning.

I don't expect the children to exhibit good sense. It's my job to look out for them.

But older teens and adults? Sadly, 20% of them appear to be lobotomy survivors.

The dads and moms that carry their children in their arms. Yes, I saw one mom fall on her little girl.

The dads that take their son out on the ice in hockey skates then act upset when the 4 or 5 year old can't figure out how to skate, sits down and cries. 

The grown men who skate backwards fast without looking behind them.  

The older teens who link arms and play crack-the-whip, never mind that they're surrounded by tiny kids.

The young men who get in a fight in center rink. Ditto the ones who get in a shoving fight along the boards. Ditto the ones who play tag through the stream of kids.

The adults of either gender who don't look before they step into the stream. Or who have some skating skills, but don't look before they turn or step in a new direction. I don't mind that they change direction. I just want a hint. Anything! PLEASE! 

And for me here's the kicker. I said I don't expect them to know about the coned off area, but I do expect them to have enough sense to see Dance Coach and I practicing fast crossovers in hold. We're a big fast moving train going in a circle and someone (always a man for some reason), will skate into the center and stand there in our path gawping at us. You know, I just want to give them a dope slap! How do these people drive to the rink? 

But public ice is for the public. I'm lucky my rink allows lessons on ice, otherwise I'd never get to skate. Thank you rink.

Hey, You. You, fat guy over there skating backwards....kid behind you...stop!....stop!....stop!

.............

RINK GUARD!