Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Test Dress Disaster

My perfect test dress is no longer in production in my size.

I am not a happy kitty
I originally ordered this dress.
Sooo perfect for the busty adult ice dancer
Either, I have to lose 10 lb between now and the test to get in the smaller sized dress, or I have to order something else. There's a probability I'll lose 4 lb between now and the test, but my skater's butt is not where the pounds are leaving from. (Man, and this dress was perfect. But, I have ordered it in the smaller size for future tests.  It's been three weeks since I've tasted chocolate--I will get down to that dress. . . Eventually.)

So I'm substituting, this skirt:

With this top in plain black with nude sleeves:

And since it's a Tango, I'm wearing a red lace bolero, that I ordered from FunkyDiva in the UK (along with some of the cutest skating skirts).

And I have a fake bun the size of a supermarket bagel.

So, if everything goes well, I'll look pulled together.
After all this trouble Dance Coach better approve this costume


  1. Babette--what a disappointment (no sarcasm here). I hope plan B works out OK.

    George A.

    1. Thanks George. I just picked up the smaller sized dress from the dance shop and it fits---in a way that that makes my muffin top all too obvious. I'll save it for the rhythm blues!

  2. This website lists all sizes for sale: http://www.dancedistributors.com/shop/review/style_7825.html?SID=353982402

  3. Please ignore previous comment - it is not the dress style you are seeking. :-(

  4. What a cutie at the end of the post...

    I am ashamed to admit that my testing apparel is simply thrown together from what I already have in the wardrobe, all black and super conservative... The only thing skating related is the over-the-boots tights, another cardinal sin lol.

  5. It can't fit you that badly if you can still call it a Test Dress. Mine missed that category altogether, and had to be called Orca Outfit. I agonized over wardrobe and Orca Outfit more than I agonized over doing well on my test!

    Actually, Orca Outfit is very special because it is passed amongst a group of ladies at my rink. Whoever is testing gets to wear Orca Outfit, then passes it on to the next tester. Orca Outfit is nothing more than a black leotard and one of those very sheer, tie-on ballet skirts. Just recently, one of us got the brilliant idea to sew a crystal on Orca Outfit each time a test is passed wearing it, with each lady's achievements represented by her personal crystal color or type. As we move up the testing ladder Orca Outfit will either be full of bling, or eventually replaced by Sexy Outfit if our diets are as successful as our tests!

    On another note, my coach prefers over-the-boot tights for testing because of the longer leg line it creates. And most definitely hair done up in a bun. And, if you ever have to wear an Orca Outfit of your own, remember that the slit of the skirt should line up with your knee. I had no idea until my coach told me. It ensures that no part of your derriere plays peek-a-boo with the judges!

    1. The Orca Dress story is so wonderful. It should be in a skating movie.

    2. Thanks. I think so, too, and thus wear Orca Outfit with pride and gratitude, cleavage and muffin top notwithstanding. The only other thing that would complete the Orca Look is for our coaches to show up in wetsuits, whistles hanging from their necks and buckets of fish in hand.