The Thrill of Speed

Faster, faster, until the thrill of speed overcomes the fear of death.

--Hunter S. Thompson

At the beginning of the lesson Dance Coach said, "Today, I shake you up."

 

I hate moments like that.

Fortunately, once he explains, I'm all smiley face. All he wants to do is alternating crossovers in Killian hold.  I do these solo  all the time. 

Then comes the shocker. He wants to do these at speed. And not what I think is 'speed', but what Dance Coach thinks is 'speed'.

My idea of speed

Dance Coach's idea of speed

And ladies and gentlemen, I nail it. 

It's taken a year plus, to get to this speed. It's not 'kid speed', or 'competitive speed', but Dance Coach told me it's much better than 'adult speed'. And it's speed with good edges and posture. Where this ends I don't know. Maybe here:

I'll have blades of dilithium crystal

The only amusing thing is, Dance Coach skates me to the very end of the open space, then since he's on the inside, he peels off to the center, leaving me to work out how I'm going to stop without slamming into the boards. Technically, I suppose I'm supposed to skate like a nice little partner, and stay with him.  But as he releases me from hold, just holding lightly onto one hand, I just stop how I want. There's probably a rule for this, but /shrug/ if I've been told it, I forgot it.

Did I ever tell you I have this funny looking stop at high speed? Drag one foot into a two foot turn, slide backwards and do a backwards stop. I can't stop on a dime, but I'm in absolute control of where I'm headed.

The first time Dance Coach ever saw me do this, his jaw dropped. Now he just ignores it. Today, he skates me into the corner more than once and I don't have time to do my beautiful T-stops. Crossovers, swingrolls, waltz holds, I turn and stop backwards. I hit the wall once, but I do  my best to make it look like a casual slide into the boards, so I can pause gracefully with my hands resting on the edge, to glance up at him and ask, "What's next?"

I'm in complete....control

Canasta Tango is looking good. We do a single pattern to warm up, then the dance as it would be for the test.  No yapping. Dance Coach is looking awfully smug, so I guess I'm living up to his expectations.

Then Dance Coach says, "I think we may have you do a little entrance into Tango."

I'm so excited, I can't wait. I can really ham up a Tango. "So, where's my music so I can practice?" The test is in less than a month and I paid him a month ago for the music cut. We had this conversation two weeks ago and there's only 4 practices left.

For once Dance Coach looks sheepish. "I forgot. You need to remind me."

I'm now supposed to text him and remind him. I guess I'll send him the picture and message below.

Please, don't forget to cut my music

 But, still, I'm all excited about skating entrances to my dances. Excellent! Something to have fun with.

And I have speed that's much, much better than old lady speed. Lookin' good!

Flubbing!

Every once in a while, I flub something.

Flubbing is different than making a mistake. Flubbing is making a big, walloping mistake!

Examples:

1. Tripping on my toepicks--mistake; Tripping on coach's toepicks by stroking in the wrong direction in hold--flubbing

2. Going to the wrong starting point for a dance--mistake; Doing the Dutch Waltz steps to the Canasta Tango--flubbing

3. Falling backwards--mistake; Falling backward and toepicking Dance Coach in the 'inner thigh'--flubbing

 Did that hurt, Dance Coach? Sorry.

Sometimes, I flub and coaches see it coming. They can then use that as a 'teaching moment'. This week I had two occasions of that. I can only guess that they see a flub coming and don't say anything because they want to see how I get out of it.

With Coach Cruella, I'm working on big, sweepy FO3. So I set up in position with a deep knee-bend T-stroke, and promptly do a FI3. Cruella saw it coming. She could tell by my arm position I was cross wired. So, I stroke, and then realize I'm in FI3--fortunately, I don't panic. I keep going down in the knee and do one, with only a minimum of bobble. So, Cruella's not correcting me forced me to think about my skating and not just reflexively skate. A neat little lesson.

In lesson with Dance Coach, he has me doing FO3 to landing position.  I do the troika, a big sweepy one, switch feet and skate backwards on the outside edge. Dance Coach is behind me someplace and I'm not looking. I don't have much control going backwards, so I ram blade first into Dance Coach somewhere between the knee and the thigh. Since I'm not looking behind me, I don't know where I hit--and I don't want to know. I put my free foot down, turn, and say accusingly, "You're supposed to move."

What I should have said

Dance Coach appears to be uninjured since I have no speed. He says nothing.  If he was off-ice he'd stalk to the new location and glare. Instead he skates in a rather ostentatious manner to a point in front of me and says in his glarey voice. "Do again, you were on the flat."

"Was not."

"Was. Do again."

The bickering balance of the universe restored, I do it again.

Why didn't he move? What lesson was I supposed to learn? Look behind me? Meh. I haven't got the control yet. Was he looking away for an instant and didn't see me coming? No idea. So this was a time where a flub may have been double flub! One for me and one for him. If I work hard enough I can do a flub that involves me, Dance Coach, and another skater. Trifecta!

Although ramming into your coach twice with your blade must be some kind of record.

Missing a Lesson

So what happens when I miss a lesson?

Nope, I'm not talking about canceling a lesson. I'm talking about having a scheduled lesson I don't show up for.

It's happened to me four times. So on average, about once every 15 months.

1. Car Trouble
2. Coach taught at several rinks, and I went to the wrong rink
3. Absolute kerfuffle about dates and times
4. Canceled at the last minute due to traffic tie up.

What do I do?

I offer to pay for my missed lesson.

In the case of the car trouble I was able to give my coach a few hours warning and he didn't charge me. In the case of the wrong rink, I paid. In the kerfuffle about dates and times, the coach had a student before me, saw I wasn't on the ice and went home, as I was last student of the day. She didn't charge me. When I had to cancel due to traffic, I paid.

My job to be there on time, ready to skate. If I'm not, I offer to pay.

I'm rather astonished by the stories I hear from coaches about parents and their skaters who don't show up for lessons, sometimes for weeks in a row. I'm a little shocked by these stories. First off, that adults would think they can engage a professional then not treat them professionally; second, that coaches put up with it. But, none of my business how a coach conducts their business. I treat my coaches the way I'd like to be treated. Pay up if I show up or not, unless the coach is nice enough to give me a pass.

Well, maybe coaches don't need to be this tough.

Maybe coaches need Accountant Cat to keep parents in line

Power! Performance! Booting Out!

When I told Coach Cruella that Dance Coach had said some time ago, "You're not ready," for progressives, she got down and cracked the whip. It was progressives, progressives, progressives for about 10 minutes during a private lesson. I got a few right, then I proceeded to practice passionately in order to perfect proper progressives.

Feeling like Oliver Twist I approached Dance Coach during our next lesson. "I think I'm ready for progressives. We've been doing them in group." I said.

Please, sir. May I do progressives?

 Let me tell you, when someone 30 years younger than you puts on their professionally attentive face--it's just the cutest thing. This is the fun of being old, I've seen everything, now I get to have fun with it.

"Tell me more." Dance Coach said.

He  had me demonstrate how Coach Cruella introduced them with the grapevine. This appears to be the standard way, because I got a grunted "Good." Then, I did them around the circle. I now have the rhythm of them, and after I've got a few under my belt I can actually roll onto the side of the free foot in the underpush. Technically this is not booting out as it's the free foot, not the skating foot. "Not any power there." I said.

He's looking happy and pleased. "High five!" he says, "Power will come."

What's the moral of this story? Well, practice helps. And developing your edges also helps. I don't think 6 months ago I could do them. I tried them once then instead of crossovers, but Dance Coach said, "Not yet." But a lot of water has gone under the bridge since then. I'm pushing myself, Coach Cruella is pushing me and it's working.

We rock through some dance skills. High fives are raining from the skies. I think my inside swingrolls only deserve a high two, but what they lack in power they make up in depth of curve.

The rest of the lesson is dance, dance, more dance. The Nasty goes okay. It's the usual Hockey Boy Tango with the crowds, but I have some power in it now. Not Dance Coach power, but more than I had a few weeks ago. Not bad power for 'the elderly'.

Then we did the Rhythm Blues. Remember I booted out last week on the first go round? Well, I did it again this week! I'm just going to plan for it from now on. I'll tell Dance Coach to expect me to boot out the first time around so I can get it out of the way and not have to worry about it for the rest of the lesson!

Edges forward and back in waltz hold go very well. And now that I'm deep in the knee my butt doesn't stick out. So, stylistically major gain!  Work on the step/cross behind (whatever) in the Cha-cha. This is the only place in any dance I've ever heard the words firmly uttered by Dance Coach in his 'safety voice' "NO EXTENSION!"

No extension, I can do that!

You don't speak Russian-you bark it

For my ice dance lesson Dance Coach came hurtling away from his young Russian speaking student, his face super-Frowny, and he started barking at me in Russian. Wow! Did he sound mad!

First thing to cross my mind? He's read my blog.

But, happily it turns out he wasn't mad, Russian just sounds that way.

Russian sounds like this

I learned "Push". Which sounds something like "Tahl-Chuck." and there's another word--russian speakers please forgive me--I think it's Tahl-chuck-kae-suh. That is apparently some variant of "Push".

I eventually want to know all the skating words in Russian, but lesson time is not it. For one thing,  his Royal Meaness is all over keeping me moving --- fast.

Don't have Power with a capital "P"? Want some? Get a coach 30 years younger than you are.

I'm stroking, and tahl-chucking my little heart out. He's just gliding along after me, being pleasant.  After 18 months of this, I hardly feel the strain and don't get out of breath.  Just don't ask me to do something new. And thank goodness he doesn't.

He just gets pickier.

Now he's working on my cross-roll on the Nasty.  He makes me do cross-rolls up and down the rink, during public. I have edges, I have rip(!), I have teeny-tiny little curves. There's probably a check-list of things I'm not doing right to boot that he hasn't got to yet. So far, if I don't know what's on the check-list I can feel comfortable and gain confidence with my skating. I appreciate that Dance Coach doesn't tell me every little thing I'm doing wrong. That would be devastating.

We run through the Nasty a few times; scaring children and teenagers. I feel bad about scaring anyone under 10. Scaring teenagers though, that's a bonus for learning ice dance on public.  Then we switch to the Rhythm Blues. This charming little dance has the evil step behinds on the end pattern. Not a problem. Coach Amazing fixed those. Evil Step Behinds are now my best element in the dance. What is killing me is the lilt/crossover, crossover and hold pattern.

We do the RB a couple of times, then third time is not a charm. I do the lilt and cross. Cross aaannndd hoollldddd. The hoollllldddd doesn't hold.  My right leg rolls to the left. The left leg that is supposed to be extended like a pretty little china figurine of a dancer, just keeps going like an Amtrak train headed for the boards. I boot out on the left leg and can't do anything with the right leg except head face first to the ice.

Not happening

Fortunately, Dance Coach decides to imitate a small civil engineering team; he hits the brakes and hauls me upwards. My first words? "Are you okay?" Honestly, he should just step back and let me fall occasionally. I fall when he's not there.

We do it again, and this time I at least get the steps right without another disaster.

The horn sounds and the resurfacer doors open as we're working on Foxtrot hold. I ask, "So what's the Russian word for 'stroke'?"

There's a long pause. Like a 15 second pause. Dance Coach stares at the ceiling while he thinks. Finally, with great hesitation Dance Coach says, "Strohk."

Right. Just like 'stroke', but angrier.

Dance Lesson: Tweaks Are Evil

"You have good edges," Dance Coach said, "Why can't you do this?"

The compliment on my edges is first. Let me take a moment to celebrate.

What can I say, it's been a good week for basking

But Dance Coach now wants me to do my inside swingrolls the 'proper' way, by rising up on the swing, then not going back down, while swinging the leg even yet higher. Yes, that last part does feel a bit rushed. Plus he also wants, more curve - aim for the boards.

Sigh. Put hands over face. It's not happening.

Oh, yeah, and I booted out on the cross-and-hold step of the Rhythm Blues.  It was an exciting split second. 

Overall, I feel I've developed more power over the last couple of months, but the rest of my skills aren't keeping up with it. What with all the new proper posture and edging I'm getting from Coach Cruella, I'm in that awkward transition stage. My skills are all over the place, while I struggle to coordinate them. 

Maybe some practice will fix this. Or maybe A LOT OF PRACTICE will fix this. Sigh/Again.

Now let me end the post on a positive note. Here's a warm up exercise I like.

This week my off-ice trainer, Miss Fitt, has me working on my turn out. This hasn't't yet translated  into improved skating skills, but it's nice to have every muscle in my legs aching in the pleasant 'I've had a workout' way.

One of her exercises is my new favorite.

Balance on one foot. Bring the free leg forward and do a rond de jambe attitude , then with the free leg in the back, rather than go en pointe, bend the balance leg deeply.  I've started doing this at the rink before skating to warm up my legs after my very brisk walk. It stretches the hip flexors and the knees in the same exercise. I do it 30 times each side.

Mar 3 Lesson: Coach's Eye ^2

I haven't skated in two weeks, and when I stepped on the ice straight into lesson, I was all over the place. Stiff legs (even though I did warm up and stretching), unsteady, and a load of lacing issues.  But on the supergood side, the rink is now offering freestyle on Saturday mornings so I can get some time in ice dance with the music. Maybe I will be ready for my April test after all!

So let's get the Disappointment out of the way. I may love swingrolls, but I look awful doing the inside ones. Dance Coach told me to get down in the knee more. He started waving his hands and talking about kneebend and flow and blah blah blah dance stuff. I just can't translate this into action. Deeper kneebend where? When?  I said, "Here just video me." and pulled out my iPhone with Coach's Eye on it. This is an app that allows coaches to mark up video and send it to their students. So Dance Coach videos me doing inside swingrolls. When he's finished I go to the View section and see the static thumbnail of my skating. "Oooh, I look good with a ponytail," I say.  That's my last moment of happiness.

Once I view just seconds of the video, I can see the problem. I need to 'sit on the edge'. I'm leaning too far forward, and man am I slow....but my edges are nice. We don't really spend much more time on the inside swingrolls, but my eyes are burning from the memory. The good thing about my skating, is that I don't have to look at my skating.

Kneebend! Kneebend!

Due to the mid-winter public sessions I've been taking lessons on, it's been impossible to do any dances. I've forgotten stuff over the last couple of months and had to go through the dances a few times to recapture the muscle memory. I've read, and know it to be true, that to get muscle memory as you get older it takes a lot more repetition to build it. Stupid  old age.

So we do the Rhythm Blues and the Canasta Tango several times with music and without. I finally get the dances together both in my head and my body. Dance Coach must have been driven to despair,  but when he gets all bossy I just roll with it. This was one of those days where I was satisfied to be on the ice and not falling down. I'm not slacking. I'm skating as good as I can. It just takes me longer to get it.  I'll practice tomorrow and see if I can get those swingrolls where he wants them and get the side pattern on the Rhythm Blues. But he did say the Evil Step Behinds were nice.

My one brief moment of happiness was when I caught a look at us in waltz hold in the glass. I was finally skating in the upright position.  Not a lot of grace. Not a lot of flow. But there was no sniping about my posture, no quibbling about my arm and hand positions in hold.  I did take a shot because when I'm back stroking in waltz hold I should be stroking with my foot pointing directly at Dance Coach--pretty much aiming between the legs--but tell me once, and it's fixed.

So I rate this as a Recovery Lesson. I've been off the ice a couple of weeks and this is the lesson where I recover my skills.

I just wish recovery involved a chocolate prescription from my doctor..

It's the middle of Lent. I'm jonesin' for some chocolate.

The student after me is the best boy skater at the rink. Dance Coach looks so relaxed. I guess in the end the best and the oldest, it balances out.

Learning a New Ice Dance

I found this in my drafts. I'd forgotten all about it. So to tide you over until I'm back, here's a breakdown on learning a new ice dance.

Dance Coach has a structured way to teach me new dances. I assumed this was the only way ice dance was taught until I twice skated with another coach who did it differently. I don't know how other coaches do it, but this is how I'm taught.

My Dance Coach's way.

1.  Learn new elements of the dance separate from the dance.
2.  Skate the basic dance without music just to get the steps in the right places.
3.  Skate to music to get the feel for the dance  beat. Even though I have a strong musical background including instrumental and vocal performance, the first run through with music is always a disaster with the Frowny Face and the Disappointed Voice both making their appearance. (Sometimes, the Deep Deep Sigh too.)
4.  At this point I run into problems. It now takes me about 3 lessons (doing a dance to music 2 to 3 times a lesson) to get a feel for the music and the steps together. I know the elements. I know the steps. I know the music. Unifying them is the problem for me.
5. After I'm sure on my feet, Dance coach adds the fiddly bits and mutters about 'power' a lot and 'lead the turn more' in the corners. This is the point where I get instructions like 'hold for two beats' or 'rise on the beat'. These are pretty easy to learn once I have the rest of the dance down. The whole power issue is never going to go away. It's a constant. At this point the only way I'll get more power is either a time machine gives me the knees I had when I was 14, or I lose 50 lbs. I'll give you a guess which is more likely.
6. Do the dance with all the fiddly bits to music a few times. (and maybe more power).
7. Test

In training this is called chaining behaviors, where the coach breaks down each skill into sub-skills which are first learned; Then the coach chains the sub-skills together into more complex skills.  I used this with my dogs.

--------------------------
Speaking of dog training, I used to train my dogs using a clicker to signal them they were doing the right thing. The other day I found a clicker while I was cleaning out the car (the last dog went over the Rainbow Bridge a long time ago). I was going to toss it away, when I thought of giving it to Dance Coach so he could signal me when I'm doing something right since the music is so loud I can't hear his voice when I'm more than two feet away. But that just seemed too weird. *

What I really need is a two way radio system.

Just kidding.
----------------------------------------
*Except there's a whole skating program built around it. And seems to help little kids and beginner adults.

Jan 14 Lesson: I Discover Fire!

I'm going to embed an important skating point in this post. Unfortunately, there's a lot of rambling before hand.

When I was learning to skate somethings were easy, some were hard. I learned things out of sequence of the learn to skate curriculum. My skating guru, the Big Guy, told me that it was normal. He learned mohawks in an afternoon, and took a summer to learn FO3. He was the one who inculcated in my the spirit of "Learn to Skate is not a race."

But since the broken ankle I had to relearn everything: proper stroking, proper crossovers, three turns, mohawks. For some reason, I couldn't do FI3. I tried at the boards, I tried in the center with coach providing assistance. Many times if I hadn't had something to hold me up, I would have fallen and hit my head.  I finally found a coach at Lake Placid who forced me to center my mass by keeping my legs together,  head up, and arms spread to balance me.  She also had this ankle action in the turn, I can't possibly describe. She got me doing FI3, but I didn't like being far from the boards. I still had a tendency  to fall off the back edge but it was 1 in 4 rather that 1 in 1. It was progress.

But my problem wasn't physical, it was also in my head. I'd developed this mental blank spot with FI3.

Over the last couple of months, I worked every session I skated on the FI3. I gradually worked my way away from the boards. I used behavior modification to desensitize myself to the fear I felt from falling. Then in Saturday lesson, Dance Coach said, "Let's try forward inside 3."

I popped one out. It was a proper FI3, with arms, body and legs in the right position. Dance Coach was delighted, "I never thought you'd get it!" Me, I thought I'd go to my grave without it. But in that moment, I felt like I had invented fire. I had got over my skating block.

I have Forward Inside Threes!

What did I do?

1. I practiced what I could every session. Even though they scared me.

2. I watched videos and tried what suggestions were presented

3. I followed the coaching advice I was given

4. I got over bad habits (looking down, hunching, not being centered). In fact I forced myself to get over bad habits.

5. I desensitized myself to my fear by slowly increasing the distance to the boards when I practiced. 

6. I KEPT ON TRYING.

And now I have FI3, something so easy that most people learn it in a lesson. Learning to Skate isn't a race, it's a journey.

Thursday Night Group

This time last year practice ice was packed with a hundred little kids, all speed and no control. We still have the little darlings, but there's a lot fewer of them. I don't know if it's the economy, or just a normal fluctuation in rink attendance. But the LTS practice ice amazingly has open space in it.

Somehow, although there's fewer than half of the little darlings on ice than last year, THEY ARE STILL IN MY WAY EVERY TIME I TRY TO DO ANYTHING! I can get one swing roll--little kid. Two chasse's -- little kid. Alternating swing rolls--two little kids zip into my path, no escape to the left or right, no time to stop, just pick one up and swing her to safety. Of course they don't watch where they're going. Sigh. It's a lesson in random movement. I can't predict where they're going next. It' like this for a solid half hour.

Typical Little Kid path from one side of the rink to the other.

Oh yeah, then I had to go learn back threes in group. BO3 are the leading source of head injuries in adult skaters. It will be years before I can do them without fear.

Okay, okay. I'm better now. I've still got some egg nog in the fridge, I may just have to go chug it. Excess sugar held in suspension in a mixture of fat, protein and carbohydrates is very soothing. Especially if rum is involved. I just have to remind myself I took up skating to relax.

Center yourself. Be One with the Universe.
Calm the %*&# Down.

Jan 7 Lesson: Canasta Tango Obstacle Course

It was Canasta Tango and Rhythm Blues today, on a midwinter public session. Coach will decide if I test in February, so I'm desperately laying down all the pieces preparatory to doing the dances. He's trailing after me, hurling imprecations about my swing rolls. I got no excuse for those; Apparently, I suffered a brain fart and switched my arms--Unbelievable!

I'm on an inside roll, when I pass near a kid. I don't touch him. I never get closer than two feet away. But apparently, I glared at him with my laser eyes.  If you had a Russian dance coach yelling at you, you'd use laser eyes too. The kid looks at me like a bunny and falls.

My laser eyes

Coach and I kind of glance back at him as we pass. He's up again. Man I wish I had knees like that. At my age, getting up from a fall involves some grunting and a small civil engineering team.

Sad too say, I've turned into one of those scary people on public ice that can pass within inches of other people on public and don't think anything about it.  Since I'm in dance patterns I'm down the sides a lot and not in the center and I pass close to a lot of people. And I look fast to them. I feel good about my skating when I'm on publics.

Unfortunately, on freestyle sessions, it's different. A week ago Dance Coach put me in the middle during a freestyle. "Should I be here in the middle? That girl's in program," I said. "She can skate around you," Dance Coach said. "I can skate around you," the girl said.  "She can skate around you," her coach said.

Great, I'm so slow I get a pity pass from Freestyle etiquette.

Freestyle hand of pity bursting the bubble of my skating ego

Lake Placid Adult Skate Camp Part II: Getting Started (edited 2017)

All Lake Placid Posts here. including more recent reviews.

UPDATED 2017

Reception:  There's a reception at the Olympic Skating Center the evening before the Monday start. It starts at 7pm. You'll get a reception packet, an ID, and a schedule. When I went there previously, the website just had an outline of the group class themes they thought they'd offer. The schedule is the first time you will actually see the classes to be offered.   Sometimes, various resident coaches will be there. The Protopopov's will be introduced. Non-resident coaches may be introduced too. The last time I went, there has been a skating session after the reception, and a group class. The last couple of years the schedule has been delivered as a PDF. If you don't see it in your email, check your junk folder. Mine went there one year.

The schedule: My procedure is to go through the schedule as soon as it's in my hot little hands. I circle all the group classes I think I'll attend so I can set up my private lessons around them. Then I start tracking down coaches. I have a couple I like, and if they're there I try and set up my schedules with them at the reception. If it's a resident coach you can email them if their address is on the website. The schedule will vary between weeks. One time I went, there were a lot of dance classes, the next time there were hardly any.  To schedule lessons, you'll need to have the ice time schedule (for the 3 rinks) and the group class schedule, in order to schedule your lessons with the coach. It's a little like juggling with chainsaws.

Paying for lessons:  Group lessons all cost the same ($13). Private lessons are different. You buy tickets at the box office. (If there's a class on the evening of the reception, you'll need to buy a group ticket the next day and find the coach.)    If you're buying a ticket for a private lesson you'll need to tell the clerk in the box office the coach's name. I like to buy a couple of days worth of tickets at a time for group sessions, and all the private lesson tickets for the week all at once. They do have occasional group class changes so you don't want to get stuck with an extra group class ticket (you can get a refund, but it's a hassle). If you have an extra ticket, you can give it to someone. It's not tied to you. In fact, treat them like money.

Private lessons: How do you pick a coach for a private lesson? Well, I found the website listing of coaches helpful the first year, and I coincidentally knew one of the non-resident coaches so it wasn't difficult for me. You can also try a private lesson with one of the group coaches, if you like their style.  If it doesn't work out, it's just 30 minutes of your life. [For example, I set up two lessons with a non-resident dance coach that I was willing to give him the ticket for the second lesson just to get rid of him, but we came to an agreement about the lesson. Still, it was a relief that it was only two short lessons. ] I suggest trying to line up private lessons early, they fill up. (If you want to skate with the Protopopovs they charge double, as it's two coaches at once.  I didn't see the Protopopovs in 2016.)

Exhaustion:  Don't over extend yourself when you're setting up your schedule. The last time I went, I skated five hours a day, plus two hours walking back and forth to the rinks. I didn't have any problems, but I want to warn everyone not to overextend themselves. At another skate camp I attended, people did overextend themselves, resulting in 3 people in one day (Wednesday) stepping on the ice with their guards on. Head cracks all around. You've been warned.

Food:  There's many expensive restaurants in the town. The rink also has a small snack bar, with soups and stuff, so it's not crap rink food. If you want to go to a grocery store, you'll need a car unless you're super tough. I hiked it one day, the nearest grocery store is several miles away (uphill going back to town, with the groceries).Now I rent a car. I'm saving my legs for the ice.

Tomorrow will be Part III--The facilities.

Dec 30: Whining on the ice

"Boh-zhe-moy!" I exclaim after nearly falling backwards while doing back cross rolls. Coach grabs my hands and stops the fall. Disaster is averted. "My boot is too tight. I can't get ankle bend."

"Don't be whiney," Dance Coach laughs. "We do it again."

I'm having a terrible time today because I pulled a muscle weight lifting, now every time I twist to the right a pain shoots up through my spine.  I spend a lot of the lesson whining 'Can't do that,' to various requests. Still progress is made on the Canasta Tango and the Rhythm Blues. For all the evil step behind is a curse upon skaterkind, once you learn the evil steps, the rest of the dance is pretty fun. The Canasta Tango though, that's requiring more power and edges than I'm used to.

"So, what is Russian for 'whiney or whiner'?" I ask. I have fans, they must have a russian word in every lesson post.

"There is no russian word for whiner. Russians do not whine."

Man, he's just full of jokes today. I'm tempted to ask if Russians discovered America, but that's from the Cold War, and he's too young to get the joke.

In two weeks he'll decide if I test in  February. Two short weeks. Two dances. Rhythm Blues is looking good, but in the Canasta Tango (sigh) there are moments my brain refuses to function right after the second swing roll. At those moments, I look like this....

The canasta tango makes me want to cry....

Dec 23 Lesson: New Dances, New Opportunities for Failure

Today's Russian used in lesson:
Shtoe: What?  As in, "You're explaining something to me while skating away from me, with your face turned away me. What did you say?"
zzdes ee-lee' tahm : Here or There? As in, "You usually start the dance at the test end of the rink, but we're standing at the other end of the rink. Where do you want to start? Here or there?"
Boh'-zhe moy: OMG! "OMG! Are you okay?"

Not only did I fall. I fell twice. In dance hold. I hang my head in shame.

We're now working on the Canasta Tango, and the Rhythm Blues, with music. Boh'-zhe moy!
Wow, are they a lot faster than the Dutch Waltz! Not scary fast, but don't stop and think fast. This is my problem as an adult skater, I tend to want to think while I'm skating. Am I on the right edge? Did I get the beat right? What's next?

After I fell the first time, Dance Coach lectured, "Don't think about your timing! Think about your skating! Dance is too fast to think! You must feeeeel the dance!" I feel the ice when I fell a second time not 2 minutes later "Boh'-zhe moy! Do you have your pads on? Yes? Good. Again." So, I stopped thinking about the dance, and started thinking about my skating. What delights are there in the Canasta Tango and the Rhythm Blues to not think about?

In the Tango, there's the wicked cross roll to swing roll transition on the end pattern, and (although they're easy to do, they're hard to make pretty) slide chasses'. For the slide chasses', I just sort of stuck my foot up in front, but I'm then lectured  about how the feet need to be side by side and there has to be some kind of dance thingy there that I've completely forgotten what Coach said.  Tango Expression, I think. No, I don't know what that means. Snap the chasse? Shake my booty? Don't know. I suppose I have future lectures to find out about.

The Rhythm Blues has many little fiddly bits in addition to the Evil Step Behinds. There's lilt in step 5, and a step later there's a cross over and hold with the under push extended. Sort of a low end Jenkins spiral. Plus alternating inside swing rolls.   It's a delightful little dance filled with many opportunities for failure.

The only thing that's not annoying in today's lesson is the music. I like the Tango and Dance Coach is in love with the Rhythm Blues music. Every time he starts the music and steps out of the hockey box, he pauses until the brass section does its little mwah mwah flourish, and he does a little shoulder dance. I think the Blues music sounds like stripper music, but I'm in the minority. At one point I looked out at the other skaters and saw that everyone, including the other coach, were all doing moves to the Blues.

There was an incidental lesson that I learned today; Skating on Freestyle is more exhausting than public ice. I thought it would be the other way around. As near as I can rationalize it, we spend a lot more time waiting for a space to clear on public, while in freestyle, we just keep going the whole time. Thus, I get little rests every few minutes. That doesn't happen on Freestyle.

We finish off with some work in foxtrot hold. These are usually just exercises in the basic steps: crossovers, chasses' and cross rolls. "Someday," Coach says, "You'll do the Rocker Foxtrot." We've been working on the easier pieces of the Rocker Foxtrot (I do not have a rocker).  "Even with the mohawk sequence?" I ask. Dance Coach gets a look in his eyes like a man with PTSD.   That mohawk sequence must be something! Boh' zhe moy!

The Magic Marker of Doom

Why is it that when any coach brings out the Magic Marker of Doom, do I know I'm going to have a bad 10 minutes?

It all starts so innocently. Coach reaches into his/her pocket and pulls something out. It's never candy or gum. It's always that stupid magic marker with the ultra broad tip. You know the kind, it's used for making posters in elementary schools, and for coaches to outline something new and difficult on the ice.

Moves coach is all motivated to get me to do three turns on a bigger circle. Out comes the marker. On the ice is drawn a gentle curve for me to do a 3 turn on. I do my 3 turn and because I have a bad habit of pre-rotating the turn, I'm on a much smaller circle. I hate this exercise. I just got my 3 turns solid this year. I'm still having fun doing them pre-rotation and all. Making them on a better shape curve seems like real work. I just want to play with them the way a kitten plays with a ball.  Threes in a circle, alternating 3s, 3s to landing position. But it's back to work on big girl 3 turns. Urgh.

Dance coach will pull his marker out (where do they come from? Is there a special coach's store?)  and draws small dance patterns on the ice. He's got the patterns in his head. I can't remember them for more than 30 seconds.  I need a Heads Up Display, and laser pattern projections on the ice to get a dance pattern the first time.  It took me two months to learn the Dutch Waltz and Canasta Tango and that was with carrying printouts of patterns  so I could consult them when I got dance lost. With my memory, Coach needs to draw the whole pattern on the ice the first time for me. Ahhh! That would be perfect.

At what point do I get good enough skills that the marker never leaves the pocket? It has to happen sometime. Does Igor Shpilband carry one in his pocket and draw on the ice for Davis and White? Doubt it.