Monday, October 31, 2011

Things I'd Rather Not See--Wrap music

Who talks female skaters into costumes like these? Because if I had their powers of persuasion I'd be President of the United States. 

Ladies and Gentlemen, Exhibit 1. Nathalie Pechalet, SkateAmerica.  I'm sorry. This doesn't remind me of ancient Egypt. I don't think of mummies.  I think something else.  

Somewhere along the road women's costume in ice dance became mostly about getting the girl as close to nekkid as possible. (I could do an entire month of blogs about the Russians psychic deafness in costume design alone. But I digress) This costume is almost repellent. If you look at it in a larger photo, you'll see actual threads coming out of the bandages. Nothing about it says "you're looking at an athlete that is also a beautiful, intelligent woman."  This costume says "accident victim."

I'm not thinking about mummies

Exhibit 2: Carolina Kostner is a multitalented athlete. But she's had some costumes that I think are clunkers. Today let's just look at her....wrappings. 

The pink color makes one think of blood. Another victim of a crash I guess. Even though these costumes are supposed to be designed to be seen from the bleachers, I can't imagine any situation in which this costume would be attractive, except one, standing in a dark room in front of a mirror.

My heart bleeds for you

On the plus side she's got her talent, her beauty, and her string of medals. 

I don't know how much input skaters have into their costumes.  So let's look at the master of costumery: Johnny Wier.

Exhibit 3: The Wierster. If his TV show is to be believed, he had a lot of input into his costumes. And he has one 'wrapping' costume that he competed in.

Nope. Not even His Highness, Master of Style can make the wrap look look good.

Let's kill this costume style

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